The Shire Phantom Menace

We were prepared for a dark day in Foxes history. On the 18th day of 2014, we heard word that The Shire were coming to destroy us.
Now, strangely, ye olde goode Shire decided it was a little bit too wet and muddy for them, so they sent their evil counterparts, Team Z , ... The Shire Phantoms.

On the side for good : Neerij . Harry . Marc . Arthur . Luca . Gabe . Ned . Ben S . Amani .
On the side for eeeeevil : Maleficent Maxi . Monstrous Lawrence . Evil Ed . Calamity Kay . Nefarious George . Crazy Connie . Carnage Kione . Sinister Joe . Bad To The Bone Ben H .

"Ha ha ha ha haaaaaaa !" the evil ones laughed as they surged forward into battle !
Our usually fearless foxes wavered a little under the relentless waves of attack, nervous to tackle as the hordes from hell galloped towards them, their orange bibs flaming under the clouds of the winter morning.

"3 touches only !" murmured the referee meekly,  as the demonic ones hissed their discontent.

 "Whoooooosh ! Crash ! Bang ! BOOOOOM !!""
"Whoooooosh ! Crash ! Bang ! BOOOOOM !!""

Two goals for the maleficent seven before the trembling foxlets even knew what hit them.
Painful, very painful.

Suddenly, in the background, a sultry figure emerged from the greyness. Dressed head to foot in black,  like a burglar, but with a figure of one who only steals pies and cakes.
"I'll play on your side guys."
His name was 'brom', and he feared no evil midgets.

"AND I'LL PLAY FOR YOU, SHIIIIRE PHAAAAANTOMS !" , a demonic voice boomed from the opposing half.
The villainous Sir Terence of Henleaze.... with an orange bib draped seductively around his neck like a flamboyant 70's pimp, mainly because if he slipped it on it would crush his insides like a giant boa constrictor.
He slid onto the pitch.
I say "slid" because he forgot his footie boots and was flailing around the muddy Downs like a contestant in week one of "dancing on ice".

But enough was enough. The foxes rallied round, pulled themselves together , and pulled themselves up by the football boot straps ! Incisive passing, surging runs, relentless pressure, and bursting with hope and confidence, the Fast, Fearless Foxes crossed the into the box, smashed it left, right, high and low towards the goal.

Eventually, 2 goals !! 2-2 !
With 10 minutes to go.

A draw would be good. A fair result. Essentially, a silent victory against the Hellish Phantoms.

B u t    t h e   t a b l e s    t u r n e d ...

The diabolical minions from the depths of the Earth rose up on their cloven hooved haunches and reared their fearsome facades. Roaring into action, they stormed towards the Foxes goal, shifting this way and that, like ghosts shape shifting through a forest, barging through the defences, and powering shots towards the goal until ... BOOOOOOM !

A goal.

3-2.

With 2 minutes to go.

Tragedy.

No Retreat, No Surrender ... The Foxes looked up and bucked up, and tried again and again, charging like they had unlimited energy. until finally ..  Ben 'Striker' Secker ... with a Birthday party lined up for later that day ... provided his very own Hollywood ending.

The last second. The last moment. Time was up.

The ball at his feet, with just the goalkeeper to beat. It's now or never.

IT'S NOW !!!

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAL !

3-3 !

The Shire Phantoms disappear in a puff of smoke, vanquished, as the Foxes rejoiced.

Soooo , until, next time demons.


Evil never dies, but it doesn't always win ...