Foxes | Year 5

Saturday, 18 January 2014

The Shire Phantom Menace

We were prepared for a dark day in Foxes history. On the 18th day of 2014, we heard word that The Shire were coming to destroy us.
Now, strangely, ye olde goode Shire decided it was a little bit too wet and muddy for them, so they sent their evil counterparts, Team Z , ... The Shire Phantoms.

On the side for good : Neerij . Harry . Marc . Arthur . Luca . Gabe . Ned . Ben S . Amani .
On the side for eeeeevil : Maleficent Maxi . Monstrous Lawrence . Evil Ed . Calamity Kay . Nefarious George . Crazy Connie . Carnage Kione . Sinister Joe . Bad To The Bone Ben H .

"Ha ha ha ha haaaaaaa !" the evil ones laughed as they surged forward into battle !
Our usually fearless foxes wavered a little under the relentless waves of attack, nervous to tackle as the hordes from hell galloped towards them, their orange bibs flaming under the clouds of the winter morning.

"3 touches only !" murmured the referee meekly, as the demonic ones hissed their discontent.

"Whoooooosh ! Crash ! Bang ! BOOOOOM !!""
"Whoooooosh ! Crash ! Bang ! BOOOOOM !!""

Two goals for the maleficent seven before the trembling foxlets even knew what hit them.
Painful, very painful.

Suddenly, in the background, a sultry figure emerged from the greyness. Dressed head to foot in black, like a burglar, but with a figure of one who only steals pies and cakes.
"I'll play on your side guys."
His name was 'brom', and he feared no evil midgets.

"AND I'LL PLAY FOR YOU, SHIIIIRE PHAAAAANTOMS !" , a demonic voice boomed from the opposing half.
The villainous Sir Terence of Henleaze.... with an orange bib draped seductively around his neck like a flamboyant 70's pimp, mainly because if he slipped it on it would crush his insides like a giant boa constrictor.
He slid onto the pitch.
I say "slid" because he forgot his footie boots and was flailing around the muddy Downs like a contestant in week one of "dancing on ice".

But enough was enough. The foxes rallied round, pulled themselves together , and pulled themselves up by the football boot straps ! Incisive passing, surging runs, relentless pressure, and bursting with hope and confidence, the Fast, Fearless Foxes crossed the into the box, smashed it left, right, high and low towards the goal.

Eventually, 2 goals !! 2-2 !
With 10 minutes to go.

A draw would be good. A fair result. Essentially, a silent victory against the Hellish Phantoms.

B u t t h e t a b l e s t u r n e d ...

The diabolical minions from the depths of the Earth rose up on their cloven hooved haunches and reared their fearsome facades. Roaring into action, they stormed towards the Foxes goal, shifting this way and that, like ghosts shape shifting through a forest, barging through the defences, and powering shots towards the goal until ... BOOOOOOM !

A goal.

3-2.

With 2 minutes to go.

Tragedy.

No Retreat, No Surrender ... The Foxes looked up and bucked up, and tried again and again, charging like they had unlimited energy. until finally .. Ben 'Striker' Secker ... with a Birthday party lined up for later that day ... provided his very own Hollywood ending.

The last second. The last moment. Time was up.

The ball at his feet, with just the goalkeeper to beat. It's now or never.

IT'S NOW !!!

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAL !

3-3 !

The Shire Phantoms disappear in a puff of smoke, vanquished, as the Foxes rejoiced.

Soooo , until, next time demons.

Evil never dies, but it doesn't always win ...

Saturday, 12 October 2013

Clifton United we stand (against)

Well, that was a turn up for the books !

Our "one team only, but training beforehand and alongside" didn't quite turn out as planned !

I thought we were going to end up with a scruffy piece of grass next to the bins to have a little kickabout in.

But no !

Possibly the best pitch we've ever trained on !
A good hour's foxes friendly match beforehand, and then out of the blue the Clifton coach tells me he has 14 kids turn up after all, and did we want to put 2 teams in !

Well, we didn't quite have enough for 2 teams, so he said, "we'll just do 6 a side then."

So everyone got to play matches ! How cool is that ?!

We split our little rabble up into 2 and away we went.

Now, I'm still waiting for my partner in (lots of) crime(s) to give me a rundown of his matches, but the two I reffed went a little something like this :

Marc, Ned, Connie, Kione, Arthur and Harry tensed up and got ready for battle.

The first half was ace. We were all over them. Storming down the pitch, shots banjo-ing around their goal, left, right and centre.

Then calamity struck ! A free kick from them billied around the goalmouth for a while and was somehow tapped in.

Up until then, Marc in goal had been braver than the lone ranger bumping into a 1000 red indians, and saying, "we're in trouble now Tonto." , and Tonto saying, "what do you mean 'we', paleface ?".

He was diving at people's feet, clutching the ball like his life depended on it. Even surviving a clash with Harry at top speed (310mph) which broke Harry's knee and span Marc's head around 4 times.

But the whole team were battling brilliantly, and at the end of the first half, I could only say, "Keep doing that !".
Very unlucky not to have scored 5 or more.

The second half, the young guns took their foot of the pedal for a minute and ended up 3 down, but only due to the quality of the Clifton team, not from any fault of ours.

Luckily though, our tried and trusted striker Artie managed to get one back.
The usual "right time, right place, right in the back of the net" kind of thing we've grown to love and expect from the fire footed demon !

So a 3-1 victory for Clifton, but certainly not a loss for us !

Well played Team 1 ... !

Team 2 :

Ed, Ben S, George, Max, Kay and Neerij had just completed one match and managed a 1-1 draw, so rallied themselves to face the Cliftonites that team 1 had just played.

This match was a proper battle ! End to end, lots of scrapping, and barging, until BOOM ! BOING ! A deflected shot ricocheted into the net before Ed could even react.

Poo. Nobody's fault. Not to worry, back to battle !

And we didn't have to wait long. The Cliftonites left Maxi alone for a few seconds too long. He cued it up and popped that puppy into the top corner.

Beauty . 1-1.

That'll do nicely !

As far as the 2 other games were concerned that were overseen by my lovely assistant, a 1-1 and a slightly troublesome 6-1 were the results.

But overall, a great bit of football from the chaps today.

2 perfectly picked out powerblasters from Maxi.
A top of the range tap in from Arthur.
And a battling, bruiser of a bang in from Ned.

But making all those possible was a fantastic team effort.

Well done everybody !

We will, we will, Fox you !

Sunday, 14 July 2013

They think it's all over ...

... it is now.

Thanks for the memories folks. It's gonna be pretty quiet now until September.

I may throw a few "Brommy's Balls Ups" over the summer just for a random kick around, but I'll let you know when they are.

I just wanted to throw you a few pics. I selected a fair few for the Tournament certificates, but a few of them got cropped and a couple got dropped, so I'll stick them in here for you now.
( Just click on the pic for a bigger version. )

Your little terrors, at their finest. See you in the Summer ...